Everyone should aspire to a cat’s understanding of healthy relationships
-they are vocal about their emotional as well as physical needs (alerting you when they need affection or entertainment in addition to when they need food), demonstrating an excellent example of self care and open communication
- they can enjoy being in a space with you while you’re each doing your own thing, demonstrating the healthy boundaries and separate interests
- they also like learning about what you’re doing and being involved in your hobbies (e.g. sitting on your laptop, cuddling while you read a book or knit a scarf or play a game)
-they consistently enforce their boundaries. first with nonverbal communication, then verbal (hissing/growling), then violence (scratching/biting) when needed, demonstrating that it’s 100% appropriate to defend your bodily autonomy by any means necessary, even against those you love and depend on.
-they demonstrate the importance of ongoing consent by respecting their ability to change their mind during physical affection and stop at any point
Before you get mad at your partner for not doing what you expect them to do, Stop and ask yourself “have I ever communicated to them that I have this expectation?” If you have not, it’s unfair to expect them to read your mind.
So many arguments are saved by just opening your mouth and saying “hey hun, in the future can you….” Whether its articulating how you like to be loved, supported, or communicated with, you have to open your mouth. Your soul mate (IMO) isn’t the person that just always knows what you need when you need it without you telling them. Your soul mate is the person who hears your needs and thinks “I have no problem doing that because I love this person with my whole heart”
So check your attitude and open your mouth. Closed mouths don’t get fed.
